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Hoekom Trou?

Hoekom moet ons trou? 

‘n Bybelse fundering

In die lig van al hoe meer huwelike wat eindig in die skeihof, al hoe meer jongmense wat saambly, huwelik seremonies wat te duur geraak het, en tans te midde van Covid 19 nie kan plaasvind nie, is die onwillekeurige vraag: Hoekom moet ons trou? Dis tog net ‘n papier. Is ons nie voor die Here getroud as ons alreeds saam geslaap het nie? 

Alvorens ons hierdie vraag kan beantwoord: Hoe seker is jy dat jy die res van jou lewe verbind wil wees aan een persoon? Hoe weet ek dit is my lewensmaat? Dis ‘n bespreking vir ‘n ander tyd. 

Die bevel om te trou:

Die bevel om dat persone moet trou, ‘n huwelikverbond kontrak maak word in die skrif bepaal vir: 

Om saam kinders te verwek en groot te maak. (Gen 2:21-24) 

Om ‘n vredeskontrak tussen nasie te beslis. (Deut 21:10-14) 

Die verkragter moes met slagoffer trou. (Deut 22:28-29) 

Die naaste familielid moes met die weduwee en kinderlose vrou van sy broer trou, om sy natalingskap te verseker. (Deut 25:5-6) 

Dis interessant dat romantiese liefde nie ‘n rede volgens die skrif is vir huwelikbevestiging nie. In Bybelse tye, was huwelike deur die onderskei gesinne gereël.  Die naaste wat ons kom aan romantiese liefde is die boek Hooglied.  

Die fokus dus van die skrif is die kinders: Die Here het man en vrou een gemaak, een in liggaam en gees. En waarom een? Omdat Hy wil hê dat daar ‘n nageslag moet wees

wat Hom eer. (Mal 2:15) Sielkundiges, beraders en maatskaplike werker is dit eens: vir kinders om as gesonde gebalanseerde volwassenes op te groei het hulle ‘n standvastige, stabiele huisgesin nodig, wat voortbou van generasie tot generasie.  ‘n Gesin waar beide die ouers ‘n betrokke is aan die opvoedkundige proses van die kind se opvoeding, veral ten opsigte van waardes. Waardes word deur modellering en voorbeeld oorgedra.  

Drie fases van die huwelikverbond: 

Die Bybel verduidelik drie fases and aspekte van die huweliksverbondsluiting: 

  1. Kontrak (Contract) 
  2. Voltrekking (Consummate) 
  3. Feesviering (Celebration) 

Isak en Rebekka: 

  1. Kontrak (Gen 24:33; 51-53; 57-58) 
  2. Voltrekking (Gen 24:64-67) 

Jakob & Leah 

  1. Kontrak (Gen 29:15-20
  2. Voltrekking (Gen 29:21-26) 
  3. Feesviering (Gen 29:27-28) 

Jakob & Ragel 

  1. Kontrak (Gen 29:27) 
  2. Voltrekking (Gen 29:30) 
  3. Feesviering (Gen 29:27-28) [1]

Kontrak:

In Bybelse tye is die kontrak deur die ouers onderhandel, die bruidsprys is bepaal en aan die ouers betaal soos, nog regoor Afrika en die ooste die norm is.  Die kontrak was veral bepalend om toe te sien, dat die paartjie self-versorgend is, en dat daar voorsiening gemaak is vir hoe hulle gaan leef.  Kwessies soos huisvesting en toekomstige voorsieninge vir die gesin is vasgestel. 

Voltrekking: 

Die OT huweliksverbond is voltrek in die Chuppa Tent,[2] waarna die bloedbevlekte doek uitgebring is om maagdelikheid te bewys.  D.W.S die verbondsdaad het tydens die seksdaad gebeur. Bloed: ons kan nie skei nie.  Ons kan nie na ons dood, ons testament verander nie. Daarom word daar in die Bybelse verbondsluiting ‘n dier doodgemaak in 2 gedeel, en die 2 persone stap ‘n syfer 8 roete tussen die stukke vleis. Dit simboliseer dat ons ook nie die kontrak sal KAN verbreek nie. Na verbondsluiting KAN ons nie skei nie.  Die syfer 8 simboliseer ewigheid. Daar ‘n ring aan ‘n vinger, ‘n ewigheid simbool.  Sommige maak dan derhalwe die afleiding dat dit dan nie nodig is vir paartjies om wettiglik te trou nie. Hulle is voor die Here getroud. Waarom het Jesus dan nie die vrou wat by ‘n man gebly het, se verbintenis bekragtig nie? “Dis reg wat jy nou gesê het: ‘Ek het nie ‘n man nie.’ Jy het reeds vyf gehad, en die een wat jy nou het, is nie jou man nie.” (Joh 4:17) Dit beteken dat daar tog ‘n publieke seremonie moet plaasvind, waarby getuies betrek word, om jou eenheid en eenwording te verkondig. 

Feesviering:

Omdat daar nie baie melding gemaak word van die program van die huwelikseremonie in die Bybel nie, en dit ook deur die eeue verkillende vorms aangeneem het, word die afleiding gemaak dat dit nie belangrik is nie. Tog is dit duidelik dat in Bybelse tye, daar ‘n baie noue band was tussen die paartjie en die uitgebreide gesin en gemeenskap. Die hele gemeenskap is genooi.  (Joh 2) Huwelike is nie gesien as ‘n romantiese ontvlugting van 2 persone teenoor die res van die familie nie. Hierdie neiging is deur Hollywood populêr gemaak, dat 2 verliefde persone teenoor die hele gemeenskap en familie staan.  Hierdie konsep is vreemd tot die Bybel; jou lewe, werk, voorsiening, en oorlewing was afhanklik van die gemeenskap.  Isolasie was bloot nie moontlik nie.  Die uitgebreide familie het gehelp kinders grootmaak, versorg, kinders geleer en mekaar beskerm. Die wettige publieke seremonie was dus onombeerlik en belangrik. Dis hier waar die hele gemeenskap hulle goedkeuring, maar ook hulle ondersteuning aan die jong paartjie aanbied.  

Die mees belangrikste deel van die publieke verbintenis en beloftes wat gemaak word, is die spreekwoordelike streep wat getrek word: Ek belowe my trou nou aan een persoon. 

Die verbreking van hierdie trou en beloftes word ten sterkte deur die Bybel veroordeel as egbreek! (Exo 20:14; Deut 5:18; Mat 5:27; 19:18; Rom 7:3; 13:9) Die huweliksverbond word gesien as heilig, met die oog op die heiligmaking van die man en vrou, om die ideale omstandighede te skep vir kinders om in die wee van die Here groot te word.  

Die straf wanneer iemand die eg breek

Egbrekers sal gestraf word: Dood (Gen 20:7; Lev 20:10) Verskriklike oordeel (Eze 16:35-41); hulle het bloed op hulle hande (Eze 23:45; Mal 2:10-17) Sal nie die koninkryk of hemel sien nie (Rev 22:14-15).  

Hoekom is al hierdie inligting vandag nog relevant? 

  1. Romantiese liefde is nie genoeg om ‘n leeftyd te hou, tot op jou oudag wanneer mens meer afhanklik van mekaar raak nie en meer opofferings moet maak nie.  
  2. Nie die huwelikseremonie of die amptelike dokumente verseker getrouheid aan mekaar nie. Dit kos harde werk van verhoudingsbou, en saamgroei om enduit getrou aan mekaar te bly.  Beide partye moet opgroei in volwassenheid van selfopoffering, lojaliteit, respek en wederkerige samewerking. Die huwelik is ‘n reis in selfverloëning, waarby albei partye groei in die gestalte van Jesus vir mekaar. 
  3. Die einddoel is eenwording, dieselfde eenwording wat in die Godheid bestaan. Uiteindelik is die drie-eenheid vir ons ‘n voorbeeld van hoe die hele gesin eerbied, respek en enkelvoudig fokus leef. 
  4. Die huwelik word die fondament, vastegrond, veilige plek, waar kinders op groei, en kleinkinders en uiteindelik agterkleinkinders floreer.  
  5. Daar is veiligheid in huwelik ten opsigte van afsterwe, testament, nalatenskap vir kinders, en uitgebreide gesin wat kan help.  Hospitale vra, wie is die naasbestaandes.  
  6. Huwelik is die ultimate liefdesverklaring. Ek wil laat die son, maan en sterre, regerings en mense, bure en familie weet aan wie ek trou belowe.  Ek belowe die trou van my hart aan een persoon. Die trou van my seksualiteit. Die trou van my fokus en werk om saam ‘n lewe te bou, vir ons kinders, en hulle kinders. 

[1] https://www.bible.ca/marriage/ancient-jewish-three-stage-weddings-and-marriage-customs-ceremony-in-the-bible.htm

[2] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chuppah

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7 ways how you can make you relationships more spiritual.

I believe our deepest desire for oneness and intimacy in relationships can only be met on a spiritual level. Although there is much to explore and discover on an emotional, and psychological level, the most neglected connection is a spiritual one. Our Spiritual connection is also our eternal bond, the permanency we all seek in intimate relationships.
God is a relational God, as revealed in the mystery of the Trinity. We do not worship three Gods, but one God. Yet He is revealed to us in three different distinct persons, Father, Son & Holy Spirit. Oneness or unity originates from the Triune Godhead: Jesus said: “I and My Father are one!” The Holy Spirit is the Spirit of Christ, and therefore He is in unison with God the Father and God the Son. The most profound prayer in the Bible is the one where God the Son, speak and pray to God the Father. It is God speaking His desire to Himself, that we would be one with Him as He is one with the Father and the Spirit. (Joh 17:21b) Unity brings peace and tranquillity into a group. Unity draws the presence of God onto the scene. The blessings of God include protection and prosperity to all who are part of that unit. The Greek word ‘homothumadon’ means to be ‘one mouthed’. The Hebrew word for unity is ‘yachad’ and it refers to a unit or a commando group.
God created two pathways for us to attain the unity and oneness that exists in the Godhead: Marriage and Church.
Today we see various models of ‘church,’ both historical and modern. What seems to be very rare is a spiritual expression of “church,” a manifestation thereof that goes beyond the church member cards and orientation programs; the superficial get-to-know-one-another-better functions and large crowds gathering to attend various special programs. These activities and program have its benefits, but we seek a deeper connection. Remember, the church is a spiritual entity! God is a Spirit and wants to be worshipped in Spirit and in Truth. The church should be more than just activities, programs, and buildings.
The Spirituality of church ultimately means: How spiritual are the members? A simple biblical definition of Christian maturity is to grow into the likeness of the character and life of Jesus Christ. The spiritual maturity of church members is thus determined by how much they do and act like Jesus. The same applies to the two partners in a Marriage Covenant relationship. The oneness we seek in marriage can be obstructed when one partner is not saved. If both are saved, often they attend different churches, making spiritual union difficult and strained. It is thus imperative for a spiritual union to take place that couples attend the same church, both take the same Bible courses together, to remain in spiritual sync else the one can Spiritually outgrow the other.
God commands His blessings where brothers dwell together in unity. Ps 139. Unity is one of the most important keys to create an atmosphere where God reveals His manifest Presence. Like in the book of Acts, powerful things happened to the church when they were together in unity, of one mind, heart and soul.
Acts 1:14 Early apostolic gathering – continued with one accord
Acts 2:1 they were all with one accord in one place
Acts 2:46 continuing daily with one accord in the temple
Acts 4:32 those who believed were of one heart and one soul; neither did anyone say that any of the things he possessed was his own, but they had all things in common.
Acts 5:12 they were all with one accord in Solomon’s porch
Acts 8:6 and the multitudes with one accord heeded the things spoken by Phillip

UNITY/ONENESS IS A GIFT

Being made righteous in Christ, we are made one with Him. (Rom 7:4; Rom 9:1; 1 Cor 15:22; Eph 3:6, 12, 21; Col 2:6, 10, 11-1; Rev 1:9) According to Eph 4:1-4 We cannot create, or work for unity, we can only preserve the Unity we received as a gift in Christ Jesus. We never want the unity of man. Man build Babel to their own glory, and God had to divide their languages. In the church and marriage, we should always operate and work from this point of unity, the Unity that God gives. Doing this is a fundamental point to consider and understand, especially when one does not feel or experience unity with your partner or friend. We are already one. “What God has joined, let man not separate.” Mat 19:6 Practically it is constructive when we are in disagreement on something, to take one step back, begin in unity, and that what we agree on, before discussing the issue causing the conflict. We do not allow our emotions and carnal mind deceive us into believing we are separate, distant, and isolated. Adam & Eve believed this lie, which when they eat of the fruit, they will be like God. They already were made in His image, had communion and free fellowship with Him, they were already one. They did not have to do anything to become more one.

ONE MIND COMES THROUGH DEVOTING TOGETHER TO STUDY THE WORD.

Dr. Roy M. Gray taught in Miracle Valley, Arizona that unity cannot be created it can only be preserved. He explained that unity comes through the preaching of the Word. The saints are a band of God that is inwardly transformed by the Word of God. Only when the focus is on Christ and His Word, will unity become the standard in the spirit. Dr. André Pelser
The early church devoted themselves daily to Apostolic Doctrine. (Acts 2:42) The Word is a discerner, and when you study the Word prayerfully, it will transform you. (Heb 4:12; 1 Tim 3:16) In this instance doctrine is important to achieve spiritual oneness because one is taught to think right, that will lead to believing right, that leads to right-living. This right-living enforces the bond of unity, whereas when people live as they like, they are carnal minded not spirit-minded making oneness impossible. Unity means to be in one accord or to agree. (Amos 2:3) In the Book of Amos, the prophet asks: “how can two people walk together, except they are in agreement as one?” How can there be a spiritual union, if there is a doctrinal disagreement of beliefs? Study all these NT scriptures referring to being of one mind. (Rom 12:6; 14:5; 15:6; 2 Cor 13:11; Phil 2:2; 1 Pet 3:8)

WE EXIST FOR THE SAKE OF ONE ANOTHER, COLLECTIVE MIND.

Paul explains the dynamics of the church using the metaphor of a human body. Remember that in a body there are no dead parts, no passive, inactive members! No spectators. “The kingdom of God come not with observation” Luk 17:20 In a body, every part exists for the sake of the other parts. The human body is a magnificent collective genius of parts functioning as one! Spiritual unity is thus not achieved until you become more conscious of the other than of self. We are not to seek our interests, but the interests of others. (Phil 2:1-11) Moreover, in our pursuit of deepening our spiritual connection, we should become aware of another’s needs as the Spirit reveals it, not because these private needs were made known in usual ways. Spirit-led actions strengthen the bond of unity, building confidence not only in God’s love but in the other person’s sensitivity to hear and obey. (Phil 1:9)
If one member suffers, even slightly, the whole body suffers. (1 Cor 12:26) This verse reveals a collective consciousness. Doubtlessly everyone immediately feels the weight and pressure if one ‘part’ malfunctions. For the body to operate efficiently, each person in the group must serve! In the body of Christ, we have equal care for the house of God. (1 Cor 12:25) Each one serves according to his/her level of faith, expertise, internal natural gifting, and grace. This spiritual union is proof of how God intended His body to function supernaturally. Look at this beautiful poetry as Paul define the operation of a church as a body. “Speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head—Christ— from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love.” (Eph 4:14-16)

KNOW ANOTHER BY THE SPIRIT

For any deep relationship to develop, we need to know one another in the spirit. Judging people by their cover is a common problem in the world, but it ought not to be so in the True Church. When I grew up, our church had “get-to-know-one-another” events, usually after the Sunday evening service. I believe most people only came for the snacks and cake! Is it possible to get to know someone by casually chatting 10 minutes after the church service? Some suggest that you get to know a person by working with him or her; however, this is not altogether true either for many people portray a different persona in the workplace. Another suggestion is to undertake a hike or to experience a crisis together. There is truth in this, but does this mean that we all have to have some shared crisis before we get to know a person? Surely not! The way of the spirit is more accurate and also quicker! Jesus knew the heart of Nathaniel even before he had met him. (John 1:47) Similarly, the Lord revealed to Ananias not only the change in Saul (Paul) but also his destiny before he met him. (Acts 9:10) Jesus knew what was in the Pharisees’ hearts. Jesus knew the woman at the well in the spirit. (John 4) Imagine a church where people know each other in the spirit, where everyone knows their place and function, and naturally work together without complaining and strife because they do not feel threatened by one another.

FELLOWSHIP IN HIS SUFFERING

That I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death. (Philippians 3:10) The word ‘know’ at the beginning of this verse means to know firsthand, to have proof of, to be entirely sure. Paul’s desire is to know God personally and intimately. But, in the same sentence, he explains that this knowledge of God is to have fellowship in His sufferings – note the word sufferings is in the plural! There is nothing that binds people together more than facing trouble together. Paul goes a step further; we should conform to His death. This word, “summorphos”, means: to take on the same form and likeness of someone. We should, therefore, live in the same manner as Jesus did, because He gave His life in obedience to the Father. We should too, daily and in every circumstance be willing to deny self and surrender, yielding in obedience completely to Him. This attitude and lifestyle of every person in the group become the adhesive that unites us on a higher level. In serving one another, we lay down our lives for each other. Joh 15:13
The understanding of Spiritual fellowship also gives us a whole new perspective on our personal suffering. Like Paul, we know that our suffering is to the benefit of the body, and therein we fulfill the sufferings of Christ. (Col 1:24) For example, being publically corrected is humiliating. Nevertheless, by receiving it positively personal growth is established, and everyone learns.

DIVINE CONNECTIONS

In the discussion of the first principle, I have used biblical examples of how people were brought together, not by circumstance, but by Divine guidance, e.g. Ananias and Paul. Another example is Peter and Cornelius. (Acts 10) Phillip was divinely led to meet the servant of the court of Ethiopia. (Acts 8:26) A spiritual church is also a spiritually connected church! It even goes beyond this. In Paul’s letter to Philemon (with whom he has a good relationship), Paul asked Philemon to accept Onesimus, his former slave as a brother. His relationship with Philemon was the stepping stone to introduce Onesimus. This example provides us with a powerful insight into the spiritual mechanisms of the church. For instance: I call on my friend Johan in Cape town, asking if he knows someone in the printing industry… one of his friends owns such a business. By linking us, Johan acts as the catalyst and originator of a new relationship. Without knowing each other, Johan’s friend, and I begin our relationship on a deeper level, due to our common friend, Johan.
We need much integrity concerning this methodology. Looking in the spirit is the way that the Spirit helps us to interact and relate on multiple levels.

MAKING YOURSELF PRESENT ALTHOUGH NOT PHYSICALLY PRESENT.

Although Paul was not present in the flesh, he was present in the spirit. (Col 2:5) This means church goes beyond the parameters of meetings and address lists. This is not an excuse for not meeting or attending church services. However, it does imply that if I have revealed my heart and is in unity with a group, I can physically be far away and still be one with that group. On the other hand, if I take offense and become bitter towards the group, and thus choose not to attend any further meetings, I’m not only cut off physically but spiritually as well. A while ago Chantál attended a Conference in America and was away for 21 days. She shared her notes with me every day, and she could follow what was happening at home base via our Church app. We experienced a wonderful spiritual union during this time, by making an effort of being present in one another’s lives. In this way, people who cannot attend meetings regularly can stay present by following and keeping tabs on Social Media. The opposite is also true, some people live in the same house, but they are not present in each other’s life. They have already turned their hearts away from the other, and will eventually separate and divorce.
Becoming more and more spiritually one is a wonderful gift and provision God has made for us, as revealed through Jesus. He often said and declared His oneness with the Father. It was this union that gave Him the power, authority and right to do what He has done, while on earth. God wants our churches and marriages to experience this same spiritual union, so that the World can believe in the Son, whom He has sent. Joh 17:21
 
 

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The Marriage Covenant

“The strength of a nation lies in the houses of its people” —Abraham Lincoln

The Hebrew word for covenant is beriyth, which means “a solemn agreement with binding force.” Though its etymology is uncertain, beriyth may come from a root word meaning “to cut.” The connotation is that of a cutting of the flesh causing blood to flow out; thus, the Hebrew expression speaks of “cutting covenant
Time after time, the Scriptures describe marriage as a covenant. In Proverbs 2:16-17 we read, “[Wisdom] will save you also from the adulteress, from the wayward wife with her seductive words, who has left the partner of her youth and ignored the covenant she made before God.” These verses indicate that the wife, in marriage, enters into a sacred covenant with God and her husband. In Malachi 2:14 we read that the husband, in marriage, also enters into a covenant with God and his wife: “She is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant.”

FIRST WEDDING:

And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.” 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.  (Ge 2:23–25).
Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” (Mt 19:6).

The oneness of covenant is beautifully illustrated in an old wedding tradition called the “covenant of salt.” Diane Warner, author of The Complete Book of Wedding Vows, explains that when a husband and wife pour individual bags of salt into a single, third bag, they are symbolizing the total mesh-ing of their two lives into one, to the point that separation is virtually impossible:

Dennis Rainey a well known Christian family life speaker writes that

“For the past two years I have had a growing concern that the Christian community has passively watched the “dumbing down” of the marriage covenant. Marriage has become little more than an upgraded social contract between two people—not a holy covenant between a man and a woman and their God for a lifetime. In the Old Testament days a covenant was solemn and binding. When two people entered into a covenant with one another, a goat or lamb would be slain and its carcass would be cut in half. With the two halves separated and lying on the ground, the two people who had formed the covenant would solemnize their promise by walking between the two halves (Ed note: see Covenant: A Walk into Death) saying, “May God do so to me [cut me in half] if I ever break this covenant with you and God!” You get the feeling that a covenant in those days had just a little more substance than today.” (from The Covenant of Marriage)

The security given to guarantee the fulfillment of a covenant was usually an oath. For men, it was an oath of such solemn character that it partook of the nature of I will or testament. The idea is that just as a testator cannot change his will when dead, so neither can a covenanter change his covenant. One way in which this was signified was by the slaying of an animal, dividing it into two parts, and then the passing of both parties between the halves (Gen 15:9).

“Divorce,” writes Jim Smoke in his book Growing Through Divorce, “is the death of a marriage and is usually surrounded by a cast of players that includes the husband and wife as combatants, the children as the mourners, and the lawyers as the funeral directors.” During the past fifty years, we have trivialized divorce, claiming that it’s no big deal; privatized divorce, saying that it’s no one else’s business; and glorified divorce, promising freedom and happiness. Lies. All lies! “Till death do us part” has been replaced by “as long as I’m happy.”

COVENANT WITH WHAT I ALLOW MY EYES TO SEE:

“I have made a covenant with my eyes; Why then should I look upon a young woman?” Job 31:1

KEEPS HIS OATH

The psalmist says this about a good man: He “keeps his oath even when it hurts” Psalm 15:4 Deut 23:23

COVENANT IS A PUBLIC CONFIMATION:

2 Kings 23:2-3 King Josiah made a public covenant before all the people.

COVENANT MUST COST YOU SOMETHING:

2 Sam 24:24 “No, but I will surely buy it from you for a price; nor will I offer burnt offerings to the Lord my God with that which costs me nothing.”

ALL HUMAN COVENANTS ARE BILATERAL AND CONDITIONAL.

There are restrictions and obligations.  You give up friends, self-interests, even your own dreams by making a covenant of Marriage. But it has to be both parties that equally make sacrifices.

SIGN OF THE COVENANT

Gen 17:10–11 Circumcision. Why put the sign in one’s most private part?
The heart is secret, and it is in the heart where one first remain loyal!

BLESSING & CURSES

Promises of blessing when the covenant is kept, or warnings of punishment when the covenant is broken

WITNESSES

The Hittite treaties called a long list of deities to witness the document. In the Sinai and other biblical covenants pagan gods were obviously excluded. Instead, memorial stones could be a witness (Ex 24:4; cf. Josh 24:27); heaven and earth were called upon as witnesses (Deut 30:19; 31:28; 32:1; cf. 4:26); the scroll of the law was deposited by the side of the ark to be a witness (Deut 31:26); and Moses’ song itself would remind the people of their covenant vows (Deut 31:30–32:47). In the covenant renewal service at the end of Joshua’s life the people themselves acted as the witnesses (Josh 24:22).

RENEWING OUR COVENANT:

revival occurred in Israel after Athaliah, the idolatrous Judean queen, was dethroned. We read in 2 Kings 11:17 that Jehoiada, the priest, “then made a covenant between the LORD and the king and people that they would be the LORD’S people.”

SPIRITUAL UNITY

“A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:12). Covenant marriage, as divinely planned, is a binding together of three persons: a man, a woman, and Almighty God. As long as the couple stays in close contact with each other and with God, they have an unbreakable bond.

LEARNING AND MODELLING UNCONDITIONAL LOVE

The LORD said to me, “Go, show your love to your wife again, though she is loved by another and is an adulteress. Love her as the LORD loves the Israelites, though they turn to other gods and love the sacred raisin cakes” (Hosea 3:1). Isa 54:6-8; Ps 89:28-29; 33-34

CHRIST AS THE FULFILLMENT OF THE COVENANT:

Col 2:13-14; Gal 3:14; Heb 7:22; 9:15
To marry by contract is to say, “Now, that I’ve signed on the dotted line, what do I get? How are you going to meet my needs—and even my greeds?” The focus is on receiving. In contrast, to marry by covenant is to say, “I am giving myself to you unconditionally. What may I bring to this relationship? How may I serve you?” The focus is on giving. Be-cause of this difference in focus, covenant and contract bring entirely different attitudes to a marriage relationship, as the following chart shows:

CONTRASTING ATTITUDES

Contract Attitude Covenant Attitude
You had better do it! How may I serve you?
What do I get? What can I give?
What will it take? Whatever it takes!
It’s not my responsibility. I’m happy to do it!
It’s not my fault. I accept responsibility.
I’ll meet you halfway. I’ll give 100 percent.
I’ll be faithful for now. I’ll be faithful forever.
I am suspicious. I am trusting.
I have to. I want to.
It’s a deal. It’s a relationship

 
A few years ago, an Alabama couple won a “Happy Marriage” contest with this description of their marriage:
We gave…when we wanted to receive.
We served…when we wanted to feast.
We shared…when we wanted to keep.
We listened…when we wanted to talk.
We submitted…when we wanted to reign.
We forgave…when we wanted to remember.
We stayed…when we wanted to leave.¹⁵

COVENANT COMMITMENT

“Entreat me not to leave you,
Or to turn back from following after you;
For wherever you go, I will go;
And wherever you lodge, I will lodge;
Your people shall be my people,
And your God, my God.
17      Where you die, I will die,
And there will I be buried.
The Lord do so to me, and more also,
If anything but death parts you and me.”
(Ru 1:16–17).
 

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Sermons

Bewaar jou Hart

❤Jou hart is kosbaar, bewaar hom ❤
Kom ons wees eerlik, die lewe is nie maklik nie. Elke dag het sy uitdagings en teleurstellings, ook in verhoudings. En dan veral in die huwelik.
Hoe gemaak om my hart rein te hou, gefokus op my huweliksmaat! Daar is soveel verleiding, soveel dinge wat aanspraak maak op ons hart en tyd!
Vir my as gelowige gaan alles oor reg dink. Wat ek in my gedagtes toelaat, of nie. Ons kan verseker nie help dat ‘n sekere gedagte by ons opkom nie, maar ons moenie verkeerde gedagtes ‘entertain’ nie. Ons weet dat dit wat die hart van vol is, sal by ons monde uitkom.
Dikwels is ons verbaas en selfs verras oor iets wat ons sê, want ons eie harte bedrieg ons so maklik.
Die Bybel sê so mooi en duidelik. “Bo alles, wees versigtig met wat in jou hart aangaan. Wat jy dink, bepaal alles wat jy doen. Moenie lelike dinge sê nie. Bly ver weg van lawwe praatjies. Kyk reguit vorentoe; bly gefokus op wat voor jou is.”
SPREUKE 4:23-25 NLV
Iets wat ek weet, en my hart gereeld voor ondersoek is trots. Ons weet die Here sê: “He gives grace to the humble” en ek is afhanklik van die Here, van Sy genade.
Begin sommer vandag deur te erken dat jy afhanklik is van die Here. Dat jy Hom nodig het om wys op te tree, om die regte besluite en keuses te maak. Erken dat jy deur die Heilige Gees gelei wil word en nie op jou eie insigte wil staatmaak nie! Kom ons word gelei deur die woord van God, wat ons harte suiwer.
Kom ons gaan dan die heiligdom binne, ja tot voor God, met ’n opregte hart en absolute vertroue, terwyl ons harte deur besprinkeling gesuiwer is van ’n skuldige gewete en ons liggame gewas is met skoon water. HEB 10:19-20, 22 NLV
Ons is verantwoordelik vir dit wat in ons eie harte aangaan. Ons kan niemand anders blameer vir dit wat ons dink of doen nie. Mediteer dikwels oor die mooi in mense, maar veral ook jou huweliksmaat. Kyk uit vir die Christus wat jy wel in hulle sien. So help dit ons om vry van offence te bly, en kan ons aanhou om vir ons hartsmens, ons huweliksmaat lief te wees!
As gelowiges is ons boodskappers van geloof, hoop en liefde! Maar heel eerste aan ons eie huis, ons huweliksmaat!
So dikwels laat ons mense en situasie toe om ons lewens te dikteer, maar ons het die verantwoordelikheid om ons eie harte te beskerm en te bewaar! Neem die verantwoordelikheid ernstig op.
Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.
—Proverbs 4:23
Wenke om my hart te bewaar in ons huwelik :

  1. Ons fokus ons harte, ons aandag en liefde na mekaar.
  2. Ons gaan slaap nie kwaad nie.
  3. Ons bly nie kwaad vir mekaar en leef met onvergifnis in ons harte nie!
  4. Ons haal nie die heeltyd mekaar se foute aan nie!
  5. Ons kraak nie ons maats in die publiek af nie.
  6. Ons is nie dislojaal aan mekaar nie (in woord, daad of hart nie).
  7. Ons lieg nie vir mekaar nie!
  8. Ons spandeer nie al ons tyd en geld net aan onsself nie.
  9. Ons gee niemand anders prioriteit in ons lewe nie.
  10. Ons attensies is gerig op net my eie huweliksmaat.
  11. Ons verwag nie die heeltyd dat die ander party die opoffering moet maak nie, ons maak aanpassings.
  12. Wanneer ons oor iets verskil gee ons nie ons posisie van eenheid prys nie.
  13. Ons is NOOIT op enige manier (seksueel ; of in ons harte) ontrou aan mekaar nie! ❤️
  14. Ons bid vir mekaar, en bid gereeld saam vir beskerming in ons huwelik.
  15. Ons is afhanklik van die Heilige Gees om ons te help, en is gewillig om te verander.
  16. As jou hart op enige manier vandag seer is, gebroke is, bring dat na die Here. Hy spesialiseer daarin om gebroke en seer harte weer heel te maak! Hy is ons lieflike verlosser, die een wat alles weet! As iets vir jou onmoontlik lyk, by God is alle dinge moontlik. Amen
Categories
Sermons

Happily forever after… is a Choice

????Wanneer happily forever after eindig in die land of forgetfulness!????
Lieflike vroue! Ek glo dit gaan goed! Heel waarskynlik is jou dag of week nie probleemvry nie, en dan wil ons vir mekaar sê, welcome to my world, our world. Ek is ‘n vrou met haar oë gevestig op die Here. Ek is ‘n vrou soos jy wat elke dag uitdagings het. Ek is nie ‘n blogger nie, ek’s nie bekend of vreeslik interessant nie. Ek’s nie eers fancy nie, ek is net ‘n vrou. ‘n Vrou van God, en ‘n vrou vir my man Jan.
Die wese van ons vrouwees, menswees raak my diep, en daarom die skrywe.
Ek is doodgewoon, ek skryf sommer in Afrikaans en Engels, sommer in een nota.  Ek is nie altyd gehoorsaam aan dit wat ek weet reg is vir my lyf of my gees nie, ek maak foute, ek sê jammer, en soms maak ek weer dieselfde foute. En tog is ek diep bewus en afhanklik van die Here. Want ek weet net Hy het die vermoë om my beter te maak, wonderlik te maak, soos HY. It doesn’t have to be perfect to be wonderful.
Ek het onlangs ‘n vroue oggend gehou met die tema : Wonderful.  Die van julle wat my goed ken sal weet dat die Saterdag se bediening nogal moeilik was. Die vyand wou regtig nie hê die woord moes afgelewer word nie! Maar Jesus is groter, en ten spyte van ‘n wag voor my mond (dit is die beste beskrywing wat ek tans het) het Hy Sy wonderful werk gedoen. Ons was getoets aan ons eie woorde : It doesn’t have to be perfect to be wonderful.
Terwyl ek bedien het, het iets gebeur wat ek nog nooit beleef het (terwyl ek bedien nie).  Ek het ‘n visioen (soos ‘n rolprent gesien) waarin die Heilige Gees vir my dinge ‘wys’ (soos in die Boere-oorlog) NB – hierdie het egter niks te doen met politiek of die Engelse nie ???? maar die geestelike oorlog waarin ons is, soos die manne verlam en swak gemaak is deur die vroue en kinders in konsentrasie kampe te sit, gaan die vyand ‘n sterk aanval loods teen ons mans (Jesus vra ons as Hy weer kom, sal Hy nog geloof op die aarde vind?). Die vyand hou daarvan om ons gevange te hou. Manne se geloof sal lou word deur dit wat rondom hul gebeur, net eers dit … en toe vanoggend rondom 04:00 gaan die visioen voort en sien ek manne, vroue en kinders met bebloede klere (egskeiding is soos geweld, soos om ‘n bloedbaadjie aan te trek). Ek sien manne, vroue en kinders ontnugter, sonder geloof, flou in die geloof. Oop targets vir die vyand. Ek hoor hoe die Heilige Gees my bemoedig om aan te hou praat oor verbond, aan te hou om vroue te equip, lief te hê en te waarsku. Bewaar jou hart meer as enige iets, want daaruit is die oorsprong van lewe! Veral wanneer jy swaar trek, emosioneel, finansieël of fisies alleen is, of net alleen voel. Die vyand is slu, en hy is die vader van leuens! Verander jou dialoog, jou self-talk, neem jou gedagtes gevange. Rig dit op God se Woord, daarin is die oorsprong van lewe. Moenie jouself bejammer nie, die vyand spesialiseer in ‘simpatie’. Hy wil kom vir ons mans, die hoofde van ons huise, die beskermers en voorsieners, en hy kom net om te verwoes! Hy wil die liefling van jou hart teen jou gebruik! Kom ons wees wakker, sonder vrees, maar uiters waaksaam. SY perfekte liefde verdryf alle vrees. (1 Joh 4:18) Ons is ons mans se helpers, hul volmakers. Kyk wat is in jou hart, en draai jou hart gedurig na jou Eerste bruidegom, dan na jou aardse liefling. Die vyand haat God se gesin. Die Vader, onse Vader, se hart is egter gesin! Sy hart is vir ons. Ons hoef nie in die land van forgetfulness (vergetelheid) te woon nie. (Ps 88:12) Sy naam is Wonderful, en Hy het ‘n wonderlike hoopvolle toekoms!
Niemand van ons trou tog met ‘n skei-mentaliteit nie. Ons hoop en glo ons storie is die “they lived happily after storie” … en tog lyk die realiteit so anders. Ons stoei in die huwelik, met mekaar, met emosies, met min geld,  soms te veel geld, die kinders, skoonouers, ons werk en soveel meer ‘afhanklikes’ wat ons besig hou, ons tyd nodig het. En in al hierdie take (balle wat ons in die lug probeer hou), verloor ons soms so ‘n stukkie van onsself, die misterie van vrouwees. Ons voel nie altyd ge-waardeer of geliefd nie. En is dit juis in hierdie onbewaakte oomblikke van jou hart wat die vyand inkom en sy aanval loots.  Dit is gewoonlik baie subtiel, dit is juis nou dat ons ons harte moet bewaak. Dit is in hierdie oomblikke wat ons nie ons gedagtes net vrye teuels kan gee nie, nee ons moet ons gedagtes gevange neem. Ons moet ons gedagtes bind aan die woord van God, aan Sy gedagtes. Is dit altyd maklik, nee verseker nie, net moontlik. Hy is, is die great enabler. Hy help ons, en maak dit vir ons moontlik om die wêreld, en ons eie verkeerde gedagtes te oorwin.
Hy wil in die tyd wanneer ons na Hom toe draai, by Hom skuil, Sy karakter wat wonderful is, aan ons bekend maak, sodat ons kan wegstap van die (place of forgetfulness), sodat ons uit die plek van die ‘dood’ kan kom, na die lewe, waar Hy is. As jy saam met Jesus uit die land van forgetfulness kom, is die lewe beslis nie perfek nie, (kom ons jok nou nie vir mekaar nie), jy sal net ‘n nuwe vlak van wonderful ontdek.
Wonderful beteken : Excellent; great; marvelous: Amazing ; astonishing ; To be filled with admiration, amazement!
For unto us a Child is born, Unto us a Son is given; And the government will be upon His shoulder. And His name will be called Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”
Isaiah 9:6 NKJV
JESUS word genoem: Sar Shalom – die Prins van vrede. God IS in beheer!!!! Selfs in ons vreesagtigste en hartseerste tyd!
“And the Angel of the LORD said to him, “Why do you ask My name, seeing it is wonderful?” Judges 13:18 NKJV
“Your testimonies are wonderful; Therefore my soul keeps them. The entrance of Your words gives light; It gives understanding to the simple.” Psalms 119:129-130 NKJV
“This also comes from the LORD of hosts, Who is wonderful in counsel and excellent in guidance.” Isaiah 28:29 NKJV
“I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.”  Psalms 139:14-15 NKJV
Ons is voorwaar wonderbaarlik geskape, Marvelous are Your works … iets van daardie mooi en awesomeness is ook in jou en my. Sonde, ons verkeerde besluite en eet van die appel van kennis van goed en kwaad, neem iets van daardie heerlikheid weg, ons verloor ons glans, ons vrymoedigheid, ons verloor Sy heerlikheid.  Ons moet ons mans vry maak van ons perfekte verwagtings, vryspreek van perfek wees, voorsien, gee van hulself. He doesn’t need to be perfect, to be wonderful.
Moenie dit wat kosbaar en wonderlik is, weggee nie. Bewaar jou hart. Selfs al is jy met ‘n moeilike man getroud. As vroue loop ons verseker nie almal dieselfde pad nie. Dit voel of party van ons ingeskryf is vir die advanced kursus. Ek weet dit, elkeen van ons sal voor hindernisse te staan kom, elkeen van ons sal weer ons harte moet vasbind aan ons geliefde, want ons kry seer, en ons maak seer. Ek weet dat Sy perfekte liefde en genade (Sy amazing grace) genoeg vir jou sal wees, vir my sal wees. Sy genade gee ons die bonatuurlike vermoë om die vyand/die verkeerd te oorwin.
“Shall Your wonders be known in the dark? And Your righteousness in the land of forgetfulness?” Psalms 88:12 NKJV
“We give thanks to You, O God, we give thanks! For Your wondrous works declare that Your name is near.” Psalms 75:1
“WONDER upon WONDER”
Isaiah 29:14-16 (ESV) therefore, behold, I will again do wonderful things with this people, with wonder upon wonder; …
Geliefde vroue, vroue van die Here, kom ons bid gedurig vir mekaar. Kom ons wees eerlik met ons harte en emosies. Ons doen wat reg is, en laat ons nie lei deur hoe ons voel nie. Kom ons bewaar ons harte, sodat daar oor ons staan : unavailable. (vir ander mans, en die vyand se leuens). J
❤Wonderful Gedig – geskryf vir Saterdag 13 Mei 2017 se wonderlike vroue oggend.
 
U word genoem Wonderful, counselor en mighty God!
Here, ek wil dit so graag glo
Maar hier in die land van forgetfulness
Waar ek nou al so lank woon
Het ek gewoond geraak
aan die vyand se leuens en hoon
Ek is onseker, Here ek het gefouteer
Wysheid het plek gemaak vir die doodsgeur, die doodsreuk
Kan ek regtig net kom
Here, kan ek net kom aansit by U tafel
U tafel van genade, versoening en
Vergifnis, ook vir my
Twyfel, shame en sonde hou my weg!
Here asb vergewe my!
O jinne, Wat gaan die mense sê?
Ek draai weg van rede
En ontmoet die Prins van vrede
Vandag Here, lig ek my oë op na U
en U buig, en U buig om my te ontmoet!
Want U word genoem,
Wonderful, counselor en mighty God!
 

Categories
Sermons

Uncover the truth behind Romantic Love

Oh, the power of romantic love! It is the most beautiful experience in the world but can become the cruelest and darkest of experiences. It beautifies us, yet has the potential to bring out the worst in us.

Why has God created us to love?

Romantic Love, in essence, is Spiritual. We only need to look at the love stories, the poetry, the songs and we find that a man-in-love has made of woman a symbol of something universal, something inward, eternal, and transcendent. He sees a special reality revealed in her; he feels completed, ennobled, refined, spiritualized, uplifted, transformed into a new, better, and whole man being with the women he loves.
We use words like ‘god’ and ‘goddess’ to describe our lovers, the experience is described as ‘perfect,’ ‘complete,’ and ‘out of this world.’ We feel raptured, fully connected, at peace, nothing can go wrong. We believe we can conquer the world. We’re full of new hope, energy, and ecstasy! We can see no fault in our lover. Romantic love is the most powerful motion and the most passionate of causes on earth. It makes people do things they would never have done before. When we fall in love, we feel alive; our senses are awakened to a newness and freshness of life not like at any other moment in our lives. Oh but the agony of love lost! The realization that it was only a moment! The depression and horror one face, when this love cannot be consummated are despair like no other. People commit suicide! They want to end it all. The rage one feels when romantic love disappoints have led in some cases to crimes of passion.
The Bible says this love is stronger than death, and many waters cannot quench it! It’s flames are fire, a most vehement fire! Song 8:6-7
When we “fall in love” we feel completed, as though a missing part of ourselves has been returned to us; we feel uplifted, as though we were suddenly raised above the level of the ordinary world. Life in love has an intensity, a glory, an ecstasy, and transcendence. We seek in romantic love to be possessed by our love, to soar to the heights, to find ultimate meaning and fulfillment in our beloved. We’re looking for the feeling of wholeness.

Romantic love is not an emotion it is a drive.

Romantic love moves us. Let’s read Helen Fisher’s scientific conclusion on Romantic Love:

I study the brain in love. My colleagues and I have put forty-nine people who were madly in love into a brain scanner (hmri). Seventeen had just fallen happily in love; fifteen had just been rejected in love; seventeen were men and women in their fifties who maintained they were still “in love” with their spouse after an average of twenty- one years of marriage. All showed activity in a tiny factory near the base of the brain that pumps out dopamine—the neural liquor that gives you the energy, focus, craving, and motivation associated with intense romantic passion — what the ancient Greeks called “the madness of the gods.” Helen Fisher.

According to Fisher her studies has shown that Sexual drive is what drives us to find a partner to reproduce. Romantic Love is the drive that keeps us together long enough for the infant to be out of danger, which is between 12 – 18 months. Because of the very high levels of dopamine which helps creativity, people tend to write their experiences in poems and songs. We, therefore, have more than enough evidence of just how powerful romantic love can be, by studying the words and expressions of the poets.

The place where Romantic love occurs in the brain is associated with obsession, high-risk gambling, compulsive disorders and drug-addicts. When love is lost, the same withdrawal symptoms occur as seen among addicts. The place where romantic love happens in the brain is right at the core called the reptilian brain. It is below the emotional, and cognitive part of the brain, responsible for feelings of reward, motivation, wanting, focus and craving. Feeling the rush of cocaine would also occur in exactly the same place. But it is much more than a cocaine rush, at least you come down from the effect. Romantic love is an obsession, it possesses you, you loose all sense of self, and cannot stop thinking of the object of your love. It is like someone is camping in your head. Not getting the person you love actually increases the effect. You just cannot get him or her out of your head. Romantic love affects the part of our brain, where we calculate and measure and are willing to take impossible high risks. This is why many lovers are willing to loose it all to win the prize of my love! They are willing to take any risk, and pay any prize to see love fulfilled. Fisher

Romantic love is a need, it’s an addiction.

Romantic love has the same symptoms than addiction: tolerance, withdrawal, relapse. You’re willing to endure all kinds of suffering, to be with the one you love. When love is not fulfilled, and you cannot have your love it leads to withdrawal symptoms physically and emotionally. And it takes one picture months and even years later to start it all again with the same vigorous power it had on your in the beginning.
Surely this is why the Sullumite begs “do not awaken love before it’s time!” This is a power that has brought great men to their end and ruin! It is a fantastic power to enjoy and nurture for a lifetime in marriage, but it can be a destroying power when you do not guard your heart. David the great spiritual King of Israel, the man that God said he loves as a friend, this man fell in love with the end-result being adultery and murder! What is the lesson we learn from history? No person is immune to its power.
The stories of Christian leaders and respectable men and women who have fallen from grace are enumerable! Daily we hear of another divorce, another sexual immoral act performed by Christian Believers.
I believe the answer has been looking us in the face for centuries! From the beginning to the end of the Bible God is calling us to one thing:
“Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul and strength!” 95% of people will acknowledge the fact that they have loved and it was not to be, or that they have disappointed another who have loved. Not many have escaped the tragedy of love not effectuated. We are all in some form of relapse. Looking on Facebook for clues, glimpses of what could have been. The sorrow of regret and the agony of being rejected are heavy loads to carry and tug alongside us throughout life. Did we marry the wrong person? Surely this cannot be it! How can something so perfect now feel so normal and boring? Where is the excitement? Where is the glory?

The truth is romantic love wears off!

According to the Imago therapists, romantic love is only the first stage of any relationship. The second stage is the power struggle. That is where we become aware of each other’s faults, bad habits, and differences. It happens to all of us. That first spiritual enlightened moment has gone by, and here we are settled in a rut.

What is God’s purpose for romantic love.

Let us look at this answer again? Love the Lord your God, with all your heart, mind, soul and strength. I sincerely do not believe God created us with the ability to fall in love, to be heart-broken for a lifetime. Surely no one is perfect and we cannot prevent ourselves from hurt, and offense! (Luk 17:2) Somewhere our bubble is going to burst. It is in God that this love is nurtured and fulfilled! It is in Him that we discover all the glory, fullness and perfection. It is His love that completes us and makes us whole. When we are firstly and foremostly in love with Him, then we can happily fall in love with someone, who has also surrendered his or her heart to Him. His love heals us from all selfishness and makes us the best partner to be with.
Religious formality and traditions will never satisfy man’s hunger for a loving God. It is only when we experience God personally and powerfully in our own lives, that we begin to look at Him with new eyes. It is when we discover for ourselves the light in His eyes, that our heart turns violently in our core! We fall in love with God! This is the core of worship – LOVE! Pouring out our love on Him, is what completes us. This is reason why we were made. This the point of life – Misty Edwards.
Romantic love is deeply personal and focused. Until we love God this way, and fall for Him we are truly lost. This is why God is a God of encounters, He is involved in our lives. He heals, and set people free. He does miracles and signs so that we can see His love. Give your heart to Him! Let your soul finally be satisfied with the true love you seek – God. This is why He gave us the Holy Spirit, so that we can feel Him, sense Him. This is why we need to be in a church, were people passionately loves God, because this love is contagious! God’s love is not selfish and self-serving. When we love Him, He teaches us to go and love likewise. He shares His love, and wants us to share it too.
Finally: a word to young people and single people. When you fall in love with someone that is not saved and born again, when romantic love subsides and fades away, you will find yourself committed, engaged and married to someone that does not have your values, mindset, perspective, identity, habits nor focus. This leads to much pain and resentment later, that ultimately leads to divorce. This person should find Christ before you commit and go deeper in the relationship.
The person you commit to should know beforehand who you are, and your desire to follow Jesus, and His ways! Do not compromise on this! What you compromise to win, you will loose! Your romantic affection makes you believe he/she is an angel and perfect, but they’re not! It’s the chemicals in your brain messing with your head! It is easy to fall in love with someone, but it is really hard to keep falling in love with a person who does not change and become more and more Christlike as they grow older. This only happens in marriages where both partners are fully committed in their walk with God.
Purposefully fill your life with God. Let His love heal and restore you completely. Love the Lord with all your heart, soul, strength and mind!!!

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Social Relevance

WALK – Holiness, poverty, and relationship-reform

Caring for the Poor, Biblical Mandate: Summery of “When helping hurts” How to alleviate poverty without hurting the poor and yourself. 
Steve Corbett
What was the focus of Jesus’ Ministry?
Luke 4:17–21 
And He was handed the book of the prophet Isaiah. And when He had opened the book, He found the place where it was written:
“The Spirit of the LORD is upon Me,
Because He has anointed Me
To preach the gospel to the poor;
He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted,
To proclaim liberty to the captives
And recovery of sight to the blind,
To set at liberty those who are oppressed;
To proclaim the acceptable year of the LORD.”
Then He closed the book, and gave it back to the attendant and sat down. And the eyes of all who were in the synagogue were fixed on Him. And He began to say to them, “Today this Scripture is fulfilled in your hearing.”
When Jesus’ Ministry was tested and questioned by John the baptist:
Luke 7:22–23 
Jesus answered and said to them, “Go and tell John the things you have seen and heard: that the blind see, the lame walk, the lepers are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, the poor have the gospel preached to them. And blessed is he who is not offended because of Me.”
Jesus Focussed on the poor: and wants us to focus on the poor:
Matthew 25:44–46 
“Then they also will answer Him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to You?’ Then He will answer them, saying, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to Me.’ And these will go away into everlasting punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.”
This is the fulfillment of the OT plan God had for Isreal:
Isaiah 1:17 
Learn to do good;
Seek justice,
Rebuke the oppressor;
Defend the fatherless,
Plead for the widow.
Deuteronomy 15:4 
except when there may be no poor among you; for the LORD will greatly bless you in the land which the LORD your God is giving you to possess as an inheritance—
God gave Moses numerous commands in-  structing Israel to care for the poor. The Sabbath  guaranteed a day of rest for the slave and alien (Ex.  23:10–12). The Sabbath year canceled debts for Is-  raelites, allowed the poor to glean from the fields,  and set slaves free as well as equipping the slaves to  be productive (Deut. 15:1–18). The Jubilee year  emphasized liberty; it released slaves and returned  land to its original owners (Lev. 25:8–55). Other laws  about debt, tithing, and gleaning ensured that the  poor would be cared for each day of the year (Lev.  25:35–38; Deut. 14:28–29; Lev. 19:9–10). The com-  mands were so extensive that they were designed to  achieve the ultimate goal of eradicating poverty  among God’s people: “There should be no poor  among you,” God declared (Deut. 15:4). 
God judges our worship as fruitless and futile if we neglect the poor:
Personal piety and formal worship are essential to  the Christian life, but they must lead to lives that  “act justly and love mercy” (Mic. 6:8). 
Throughout the New  Testament, care of the poor is a vital concern of the  church (Matt. 25:31–46; Acts 6:1–7; Gal. 2:1–10; 6:10James 1:27). Perhaps no passage states it more suc-  cinctly than 1 John 3:16–18
God’s answer to the poverty question of mankind is His kingdom:
The kingdom is the renewal of the whole world through the entrance of supernatural forces. As things are brought back under Christ’s rule and authority, they are restored to health, beauty, and free- dom.
Jesus Ministry started preaching the Kingdom: Mat 4:17 instructing His disciples to do the same: Luke 9:2; Luke 10:9 and the first church did the same: Acts 4:34; 10:45
The way God shows His Kingdom to the World is by using the poor, the weak en simple to display His glory:
James 2:5 
Listen, my beloved brethren: Has God not chosen the poor of this world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom which He promised to those who love Him?
1 Corinthians 1:26–29 
For you see your calling, brethren, that not many wise according to the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble, are called. But God has chosen the foolish things of the world to put to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to put to shame the things which are mighty; and the base things of the world and the things which are despised God has chosen, and the things which are not, to bring to nothing the things that are, that no flesh should glory in His presence.
Poor people typically talk in terms of shame, inferiority, powerlessness, humiliation, fear, hopelessness, depression, social isolation, and voicelessness.
God established four foundational relationships for each person: a relationship with God, with self, with others, and with the rest of creation (see figure 2.1).¹⁴ These relationships are  the building blocks for all of life. When they are  functioning properly, humans experience the full-  ness of life that God intended, because we are being  what God created us to be
Poverty is the result of relationships that do not work, that are not just, that are not for life, that are not harmonious or enjoyable. Poverty is the absence of shalom in all its meanings
Every human being is suffering from a poverty of spiritual intimacy, a poverty of being, a poverty of community, and a poverty of stewardship.
The materially poor are trapped by multiple, interconnected factors—insufficient assets, vulnerability, powerlessness, isolation, and physical weakness— that ensnare them like bugs caught in a spider’s web.¹⁷ Imagine being caught in such a web.
According to Nobel Laureate Amartya Sen, it is this lack of freedom to be able to make meaningful choices—to have an ability to affect one’s situation—that is the distinguishing feature of poverty
Poverty alleviation is the ministry of reconciliation: moving people closer to glorifying God by living in right relationship with God, with self, with others, and with the rest of creation. Material poverty alleviation is working to reconcile the four foundational relationships so that people can fulfill their callings of glorifying God by working and supporting themselves and their families with the fruit of that work.
We are building people, leaders, community, an economic base, and capacity, not a product for profit.
Categories
Blogs

Discover what makes God happy – Multiplication

We often equate faithfulness with being steadfast, consistency, being dependable, reliable, dependable, loyal, true, trustworthy, devoted, truthful. Jesus equates faithfulness with something else – multiplication. Whatever God gives to us, He expects us to multiply and present it back to Him. John Bevere
The Parable of the 10 Virgins (Mat 25:1–13) does not reveal the meaning of “taking oil with you”, and thus many sermons suggested oil, referring to the Holy Spirit.  But you cannot buy the Holy Spirit.  It is evident that the parable’s focus is about being prepared for the coming of the Lord. These two parables are interrelated, both starting with “then the kingdom of God is likened” and both ending with God’s judgment.  The second parable explains the first.  The wise virgins were preparing for the unexpected delay of the bridegroom (v. 5). The best way we can prepare for the delay of his coming is, making disciples who can continue after our death. We need to duplicate our lives so that the flame of the gospel can keep burning. Freely we have received, freely we need to give. Mat 10:8
Read the rest of the portion of scripture; Mat 25:14-30
His goods – The money was His, and they were only stewards.  My farm worker who uses my car, cannot come and give me back my car, and demand a blessing for returning it.  We cannot twist God’s arm with our tithes and giving, to give us more. It is all His in the first place. He wants us to look after it, and make it grow, cultivate it.
Trade: to work, perform by labor, to do, produce, cultivate the earth. Gen 1:28
Mat 25:15 five talents The Greek text indicates an amount equal to 75 years’ wages thus the average years of a person’s live. The talents were of silver (money in Matt. 25:18 is argyrion, which means silver money). A talent weighed between 58 and 80 pounds. Again the average weight of a man.  Our lives should reproduce, multiply, and cultivate the righteousness, and God-given abilities we have received.  The old Protestant preachers would always ask: “what are you going to do with Christ you have received?”
Each according to their ability: we all have received intrinsic natural gifts talents, and influence.  Righteousness is receiving sonship; now God wants us to cultivate what we have received.
“you knew that I reap where I have not sown, and gather where I have not scattered seed” The wicked and lazy servant did not know the character of hIs master.  This scripture in-plicately reveals the true meaning of the parable; God wants to reap a harvest where He has not sown, he first sown seed in us, not we sow, and reap a harvest exponentially for Him.
‘For to everyone who has, more will be given, and he will have abundance; but from him who does not have, even what he has will be taken away”
25:29  have abundance, perisseuo  (per-is-syoo-oh); Strong’s #4052:  To superabound, have in excess, greatly surpass, excel. The word shows the generosity of God’s grace, giving assurance that faithful use of one’s talents and gifts sets the stage for one’s own advancement. The abundance of life is already within you.  Your provision is within you. Give yourself, serve others with your abilities and gifts, and provision will follow you.  He who chase after money never finds it.
Let’s look at Jesus’ example:
Jesus worked – John 5:17 what was His primary work?
Taught and disciplined 12 men – 2 Tim 2:20 and in the end He presented them back to God. Joh 17:4 He prays for them but eventually pray for their fruitful offspring. Joh 17:20 The seed principle is part of God’s nature, He created every living thing from this principle. Man cannot duplicate this original reproducing seed. The seed man creates cannot reproduce after its original kind. OMG Disciples are gifts. They are added by God in our lives, for a period to raise. Like, children.
Acts 10:38 – went about doing good
Works of faith – Multiplied bread Mat 15:32-39
The circuit of ministry – Mark 6:6 Then He went about the villages in a circuit, teaching.
He died – Joh 12:24 
Why did the servant hide the talent in the ground? He was afraid of losing it.  Scared of taking risks.  He did not believe in his own ability. He was also called lazy. This servant was only seeking an excuse to do nothing and not be productive.  Excuses are what keeps most people from doing: they try to justify their actions.  Excuses like: “evangelism is not my gift or calling, or I cannot sell anything.  We become good at anything we practice. We only need to start.  We all receive a mostly healthy body, but being lazy we do not cultivate it, we become over weight, and more an more restricted to do what that the body was made to do.  When we exercise we discover that the body is capable of much more, and we begin to do what we thought was impossible.
“Enter into the joy of the Lord” God is well pleased. We enter into Him being happy and delighted at our work, and faithfulness.  The end of both these parables concludes: those who did not multiply was not given access to enter the Kingdom of heaven.
We were naturally made to reproduce. Like a tree multiplying its fruit, it is doing what it was made to do.  It is natural for a healthy tree to reproduce.  Fear, laziness, and stubbornness is not natural.   God gave to each one according to their ability, and they had the means, they only had to obey.
May our eyes be opened to the riches that God has placed within us in Christ Jesus. Let us break loose of the lies and excuses that hold us back.  Let our lives be productive and multiply that what He has placed in us.

Categories
Sermons

Wat is God se hart rakende seksuele sondes?

OWERSPEL | ONTROUHEID | VERKRAGTING | VOORHUWELIKSE SEKS | HOMOSEKSUALITEIT | MASTURBASIE | BLOEDSKANDE | ONTUG | LOSBANDIGHEID | WELLUS | PEDOFIEL | UITLOKKEND | PORNOGRAFIE | FLIRTASIE | PROSTITUSIE | VOYEURISME | NUDISME
Seksuele sondes is ’n donker ‘abyss’ van misbruik, geweld en verwoesting. God het ons seksuele drange gegee omdat dit goed is, sodat ons geestelik, emosioneel maar ook fisies EEN met ons huweliksmaat kan raak. Ons verwelkom Sy lig, want as kinders van die lig het ons nodig dat Sy lig ons genees en al hoe nader bring na die Son van geregtigheid met genesing in Sy strale. Die Bybel lys al die sondes, maar wat is God se hart, wat is Sy begeerte vir ons?
Die kern van al die bogenoemde sondes is die fokus op self. “Self idolatry” Ek word die God, en ek moet aanbid word, ek moet kry, my wil, my plesier.

God se verhouding met Sy bruid, ons voorbeeld. 

Die verhouding tussen God en Sy bruid is nie nuut nie, maar is vir ons ‘n voorbeeld oor God se verhouding met Sy kerk, maar ook ons verhouding met ons huweliksmaats. (Ezekiel 16:4-10) En Ek het by jou verbygegaan en jou gesien, en kyk, jou tyd was die tyd van liefde. Toe het Ek my vleuel oor jou uitgesprei en jou naaktheid toegedek. Ja, Ek het vir jou gesweer en met jou ’n verbond aangegaan, spreek die Here Here, en jy het myne geword.[1] Is die liefdestaal nie mooi nie? God voel oor sy volk/kerk soos ‘n man oor Sy bruid. Ons sien weer hierdie taalgebruik in Efesiërs 5. Manne, julle moet jul eie vroue liefhê, soos Christus ook die gemeente liefgehad en Homself daarvoor oorgegee het 26 om dit te heilig, nadat Hy dit gereinig het met die waterbad deur die woord, 27sodat Hy die gemeente voor Hom kon stel, verheerlik, sonder vlek of rimpel of iets dergeliks; maar dat dit heilig en sonder gebrek sou wees.[2] Dit is duidelik dat God ons wil wys hoe die liefde werk in ‘n huwelik: Soek die beste vir jou maat. Jou maat se groei, ontwikkeling, heiligmaking, opheffing, opbouing en soos Jesus word is jou fokus en einddoel. Hoe ons maat blink, skyn, en sprankel van vrede en geluk is jou beloning.
Hoerery en ontrouheid is die groot sonde van die volk Israel. Telkemale verraai Israel God se liefde deur agter ander gode aan te hardloop, en op hulle te vertrou. Die storie herhaal homself regdeur die ou Testament oor en oor. Paulus deel juis, met seksuele onreinheid en immoraliteit. (Eph 5:1-7) Weet dus dat geen hoereerder geen erfdeel het aan die Koninkryk van God nie.

Ons almal soek na Sy liefde:

Die mens het ‘n diep behoefte om opreg liefgehê te word. Ons soek almal iemand wat vir ons goed sal wees, sag en teer met ons is, geduldig en lojaal is. Iemand wat ons kan vertrou, en wat ons onvoorwaardelik liefhet. God is liefde. God draai hierdie behoefte om en stort Sy Gees in ons uit sodat ons nou ander kan liefhê soos Hy. Die vrug van die Gees is alles maniere van hoe jy liefgehê wil word, maar nou werk God Sy liefdesvrug in jou om Sy liefde uit te gee eerder as om te ontvang. Dis die eerste manier van hoe God se liefde anders werk as die liefde van ‘n mens. Liefde, vreugde, vrede, sagmoedig, geduldig, goed, nederig, geloof en selfbeheersing is God se manier hoe Hy liefhet. (Love, peace, joy, patient, kind, good, faith, meekness and temperance) Ons raak maklik verlief op iemand wat ons liefhet, waar ons vrede en tuiste vind, waar ons gelukkig is. Ons voel veilig by iemand wat nie op hulleself fokus nie, en wat in ons glo en wat hulle eie behoefte om te wil ontvang uitstel. Onlangs vertel ‘n vrou met opregte seer in haar oë dat sy liefde gevind het in die arms van ‘n ander vrou, oor haar diep teleurstelling met mans se hulle liefde wat net nie bevredig nie. Sy vind nou van hierdie Goddelike eienskappe in ‘n ander vrou. Ek wonder watter persentasie van alle seksuele misdrywe se oorsaak dalk te wyte is aan gebroke verhoudings as gevolg van ‘n gebrek aan Goddelike liefde.
Die slagveld van seksuele misbruik lê diep en wyd vol gewondes wat nie weet hoe om lief te hê of liefde te ontvang nie.

Die konteks van seksualiteit is ‘n gesonde familie. 

Die eerste seksuele oortreding volgens die Bybel is wanneer ons ‘n familielid ‘n seksobjek maak, broers met susters, ouers met kinders, bloedskande. (Lev 18:17; 20:12) Die Bybelse familie het die meeste van die tyd dieselfde vertrek gedeel, wat die fokus op seks beperk het. Die meeste seksuele misbruik is egter vandag ook binne die raamwerk van familie, maar in isolasie. Die gesonde familie bied ‘n atmosfeer vir seksualiteit om normaal te bly. Familie is die wese van die Godheid. Vader, Seun en Heilige Gees. Wanneer die kerk die hart van familie verloor, verloor ons die wese van God se hart. Vaders en moeders wat mekaar en hulle kinders liefhet met ‘n goddelike vrug van die Gees liefde, maak gesonde en selfstandige kinders groot. Kinders wat hulle ouers en broers en susters liefhet op ‘n goddelike vrug van die Gees liefde, versterk die band nog verder, en maak die familie ‘n ondeurdringbare krag.
Dis met hierdie gedagte en begrip dat Paulus die Korinte gemeente vermaan; “’N MENS hoor waarlik van hoerery onder julle, en hoerery van so ’n aard as wat selfs onder die heidene nie bekend is nie: dat iemand die vrou van sy vader het. 2 En tog is julle opgeblase in plaas dat julle liewer getreur het, sodat hy wat hierdie daad gedoen het, kan verwyder word onder julle uit.”[3] Die gemeente is ‘n geesvervulde kragtige gemeente, en tog sien hulle seksuele misdrywe maklik oor. Hulle ‘tolerate’ dit! Hulle mis God se hart oor familie. Die bruid is bestem om die vrou van die Seun van God te word! Seksuele sonde is ‘n regstreekse verraaiing van God se hart, van eenheid, van Sy liefde, van Sy orde. Daarom die drastiese optrede, weereens binne die raamwerk van familie. Paulus maak dit duidelik, dat hy verwys na mense binne die huisgesin van God. (1 Cor 5:12)

Dissipline en God se Gesin

Die kern van Bybelse straf en tug is gerig om te red, nie totaal weg te stoot en te verwerp nie. Ons kyk met ‘n ewigheidsblik en motief. “Dat hy so iemand aan Satan oor lewer tot verderf van die vlees, sodat die gees gered kan word in die dag van die Here Jesus.”[4] Ons kan nog nie die wêreld oordeel nie, ons sal eendag. (2 Cor 6:2) Nou roep Paulus die kerk om die binne in die gesin van God streng te vermaan, soos ‘n Pa ‘n rebelse kind vermaan en straf. Die rebelsheid van een kind wat oorgesien word, maak die ander kinders ook rebels. Die kind moet voel hoe dit voel om uitgelewer te word, buite te wees. Sonder beskerming, sonder al die voordele. Sodat die kind tot inkeer sal kom, sy liggaam die konsekwensies betaal van sy of haar dade maar gered vir die ewigheid.
As die kerk en geestelike ouers nie ferm op tree nie, word die hele familie en gesin besoedel. (1 Cor 5:6) Dis sekerlik die waarheid van al die sondes, seksuele sonde is die maklikste oordraagbaar. Dit is ook duidelik uit hierdie skrifgedeelte dat nie alle sonde dieselfde is nie. Iemand wat verkrag word, beleef nie dieselfde seer as om voor gelieg te word, of om van geskinder te word nie. Die verwoesting van egbreek en owerspel raak gesinne, die hele uitgebreide familie, en generasies om te kom. (Mal 2:10-16) Seksuele sonde is ‘n sonde teen jou eie liggaam. (2 Cor 6:18) Dit verraai die verbondenheid en eenheid van God se liefde.

Verbond, eenwording, in verbondenheid tekens van ‘n dieper konneksie.

Die woord verbond kom telkens voor in hierdie 2 hoofstukke. God het verbond daar gestel om ons te wys op die eenheid wat in die Godheid bestaan. Jy kan nie God skei nie, hulle is een! Net so min kan ‘n man en vrou skei. Sien die blog oor hoe hierdie eenheid werk. Dit is hoekom die volgende sondes teen die karakter en hart van verbond is. “Moenie dwaal nie! Geen hoereerders of afgodedienaars of egbrekers of wellustelinge of sodomiete of diewe of gierigaards of dronkaards of kwaadsprekers of rowers sal die koninkryk van God beërwe nie.”[5] Paulus praat eksplisiet oor die eenheid tussen man en vrou en die verkeerd van egbreek. Of weet julle nie dat julle liggaam ’n tempel is van die Heilige Gees wat in julle is, wat julle van God het, en dat julle nie aan julself behoort nie? 20 Want julle is duur gekoop. Verheerlik God dan in julle liggaam en in julle gees wat aan God behoort.[6]
“en net so het ook die manne die natuurlike verkeer met die vrou laat vaar en in hulle wellus teenoor mekaar ontbrand: manne het met manne skandelikheid bedrywe en in hulleself die noodwendige vergelding van hulle dwaling ontvang.”[7] Die dwaling van homoseksualiteit probeer hulle dade regverdig, maar ‘n mens sien ongelukkig nie sy dwaling reg in die begin nie, dis eers baie later wanneer jy ouer is wat sien hoe ver jy afgedwaal het van God se plan. Hulle redeneer dat dit nie ‘n sonde is nie, hulle is dan so gemaak, so geskape deur die Here. Maar om ‘n rowwe humeur te hê van jongs af, maak nie jou humeur toelaatbaar nie. Dieselfde geld vir al die sondes. Ons is almal in sonde gebore en het ‘n innerlike geneigdheid na die verkeerde, maar dit regverdig nie ons verkeerde gedrag nie, ek is nou maar so gemaak, dit is hoe dit is nie … (Rom 2:23) Jesus red sondaars! Hy alleen kan ons verander in ‘n oomblik en ons nuwe mense maak. (2 Cor 5:27). Die krag van Jesus Christus tot redding is groter as die misleiding van die vyand.

Die verskil tussen wellus en Goddelike liefde

Seksuele sondes is egter volop in die kerk: Egbreek, owerspel, pornografie, voorhuwelikse seks, pedofiele en ook verkragting. Vir gelowiges is ons gesig gerig na Hom, en stap ons elke dag verder weg van hierdie praktyke na Sy heerlike lig. (Kol 3:1-10) Iemand wat vasgevang is in seksuele sonde eien hulleself die reg toe om bevredig te word ten koste van iemand anders. Hulle bou hulle geluk/bevrediging/plesier/genot op iemand anders se seer. God het bedoel dat seks ‘n wonderlike ‘celebration’ is van die eenheid tussen ‘n man en ‘n vrou! Dan is die huweliksdaad gemaklik, normaal en bied beide partye wederkerige plesier en genot. Dis vloei uit die vrug van die Heilige Gees.
John Piper skryf in sy boek “Sex and the supremacy of Christ” Sexuality is designed by God as a way to know God in Christ more fully. Knowing God in Christ more fully is designed as a way of guarding and guiding our sexuality” Soos my vriend Mike Wood my geleer het: “all addiction is a sign of malnutrition” Ons seksuele begeerte soek ‘n dieper konneksie as bloot net kontak met ‘n liggaam. Ons is soekend na ‘n eenheid en ‘n volheid, ‘n vervulling wat net in ons verbondenheid met Christus vervul kan word. Jesus oorwin alle seksuele temptasies omdat Hy liefhet soos God liefhet. Hy betaal vir ons sonde met Sy lewe, sodat ons vry kan wees. HY genees elke keer op ‘n ander manier, want hy wil nie net die liggaam genees nie, Hy wil ons genees op elke vlak. Die vrou wat lei aan verwerping oor haar siekte met bloedvloeiing word openlik herstel, die owerspelige vrou wat op heterdaad betrap is kry Sy genade, die moeder se seun lewe, die blinde sien.
Seksuele sonde is selfsugtig, selfbehep, self-indulgent. God se liefde gee, en gee, en gee vanuit ‘n onuitputbare fontein van wie Hy is! Soos ons groei om elke dag meer soos Hy lief te hê, herstel hy die soeke in ons eie hart, en maak ons vol, vergenoegd, en tevrede!

Die wonderlike goddelike geskenk van selibaat wees.

Selibaat wees is ‘n geskenk. Dis die eerste prys volgens Paulus. (1 Cor 7:7) Om selibaat te wees is nie ‘n vloek of straf nie, inteendeel Jesus was selibaat, Paulus verkies sy alleenwees bo ‘n huweliksmaat. Weereens vanuit die perspektief van die die vrug van die Heilige Gees, leer God ons om seks nie eerste prioriteit te maak nie. Ons kan wag. Dit is die vrug van selfbeheersing, temperance (abstaining from excess). Die jongmens wag en hou sy pad rein tot op die huweliksnag. Die man en vrou kan wag vir tye van gebed en toewyding aan God. (1 Kor 7:1-5) Daar is swangerskap, terminale siekte, maandstonde… alles tye van wag en seksuele stilte. Seksualiteit is siklies, soos die getye in die see. Ons is nie gemaak om altyd op stormsterkte te funksioneer nie. Dit is abnormaal. Paulus bring sy liggaam en vlees onder beheer, deur dit te ‘restrain’. (1 Cor 9:27) But [like a boxer] I buffet my body [handle it roughly, discipline it by hardships] and subdue it, for fear that after proclaiming to others the Gospel and things pertaining to it, I myself should become unfit [not stand the test, be unapproved and rejected as a counterfeit].
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Die bruid verteenwoordig God se hart, waardes en leefstyl op aarde. Ons dade is belangriker as woorde, want ons dade preek. Wanneer kerkleiers nie daadwerklik optree en die gesin van God soos waardige geestelike ouers opvoed nie, dan verloor die kerk Sy mandaat en krag. Daarom Paulus se sterk optrede! Dit gaan oor God se eer!

Heiligmaking is hoe God die kerk gebruik om mense tot ‘n sondebesef te bring.

 
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Gaan lees gerus weer 1 Corintians 5, 6 en 7. Sien God se hart vir familie! Sien Sy hart en soeke na volwassenheid, mense wat sake kan oordeel en uitsluitsel gee. Sien God se hart oor die heiligheid van Sy kerk, jy die individu, die lokale gemeente en die kerk universeel.
[1] Die Bybel: Ou Vertaling. (1996). (Eze 16:8).
[2] Die Bybel: Ou Vertaling. (1996). (Eph 5:25–27).
[3] Die Bybel: Ou Vertaling. (1996). (1 Co 5:2).
[4] Die Bybel: Ou Vertaling. (1996). (1 Co 5:5).
[5] Die Bybel: Ou Vertaling. (1996). (1 Co 6:10).
[6] Die Bybel: Ou Vertaling. (1996). (1 Co 6:19–20).
[7] Die Bybel: Ou Vertaling. (1996). (Ro 1:27).
[8] The Amplified Bible. (1987). (1 Co 9:27).

Categories
Preke

Wat is God se hart rakende seksuele sondes?

OWERSPEL | ONTROUHEID | VERKRAGTING | VOORHUWELIKSE SEKS | HOMOSEKSUALITEIT | MASTURBASIE | BLOEDSKANDE | ONTUG | LOSBANDIGHEID | WELLUS | PEDOFIEL | UITLOKKEND | PORNOGRAFIE | FLIRTASIE | PROSTITUSIE | VOYEURISME | NUDISME

Seksuele sondes is ’n donker ‘abyss’ van misbruik, geweld en verwoesting. God het ons seksuele drange gegee omdat dit goed is, sodat ons geestelik, emosioneel maar ook fisies EEN met ons huweliksmaat kan raak. Ons verwelkom Sy lig, want as kinders van die lig het ons nodig dat Sy lig ons genees en al hoe nader bring na die Son van geregtigheid met genesing in Sy strale. Die Bybel lys al die sondes, maar wat is God se hart, wat is Sy begeerte vir ons?

Die kern van al die bogenoemde sondes is die fokus op self. “Self idolatry” Ek word die God, en ek moet aanbid word, ek moet kry, my wil, my plesier.

God se verhouding met Sy bruid, ons voorbeeld. 

Die verhouding tussen God en Sy bruid is nie nuut nie, maar is vir ons ‘n voorbeeld oor God se verhouding met Sy kerk, maar ook ons verhouding met ons huweliksmaats.  (Ezekiel 16:4-10) En Ek het by jou verbygegaan en jou gesien, en kyk, jou tyd was die tyd van liefde. Toe het Ek my vleuel oor jou uitgesprei en jou naaktheid toegedek. Ja, Ek het vir jou gesweer en met jou ’n verbond aangegaan, spreek die Here Here, en jy het myne geword.[1] Is die liefdestaal nie mooi nie? God voel oor sy volk/kerk soos ‘n man oor Sy bruid. Ons sien weer hierdie taalgebruik in Efesiërs 5. Manne, julle moet jul eie vroue liefhê, soos Christus ook die gemeente liefgehad en Homself daarvoor oorgegee het 26 om dit te heilig, nadat Hy dit gereinig het met die waterbad deur die woord, 27sodat Hy die gemeente voor Hom kon stel, verheerlik, sonder vlek of rimpel of iets dergeliks; maar dat dit heilig en sonder gebrek sou wees.[2] Dit is duidelik dat God ons wil wys hoe die liefde werk in ‘n huwelik: Soek die beste vir jou maat. Jou maat se groei, ontwikkeling, heiligmaking, opheffing, opbouing en soos Jesus word is jou fokus en einddoel.  Hoe ons maat blink, skyn, en sprankel van vrede en geluk is jou beloning.

Hoerery en ontrouheid is die groot sonde van die volk Israel.  Telkemale verraai Israel God se liefde deur agter ander gode aan te hardloop, en op hulle te vertrou.  Die storie herhaal homself regdeur die ou Testament oor en oor.  Paulus deel juis, met seksuele onreinheid en immoraliteit. (Eph 5:1-7) Weet dus dat geen hoereerder geen erfdeel het aan die Koninkryk van God nie.

Ons almal soek na Sy liefde:

Die mens het ‘n diep behoefte om opreg liefgehê te word. Ons soek almal iemand wat vir ons goed sal wees, sag en teer met ons is, geduldig en lojaal is. Iemand wat ons kan vertrou, en wat ons onvoorwaardelik liefhet. God is liefde. God draai hierdie behoefte om en stort Sy Gees in ons uit sodat ons nou ander kan liefhê soos Hy. Die vrug van die Gees is alles maniere van hoe jy liefgehê wil word, maar nou werk God Sy liefdesvrug in jou om Sy liefde uit te gee eerder as om te ontvang. Dis die eerste manier van hoe God se liefde anders werk as die liefde van ‘n mens.  Liefde, vreugde, vrede, sagmoedig, geduldig, goed, nederig, geloof en selfbeheersing is God se manier hoe Hy liefhet.  (Love, peace, joy, patient, kind, good, faith, meekness and temperance) Ons raak maklik verlief op iemand wat ons liefhet, waar ons vrede en tuiste vind, waar ons gelukkig is.  Ons voel veilig by iemand wat nie op hulleself fokus nie, en wat in ons glo en wat hulle eie behoefte om te wil ontvang uitstel.  Onlangs vertel ‘n vrou met opregte seer in haar oë dat sy liefde gevind het in die arms van ‘n ander vrou, oor haar diep teleurstelling met mans se hulle liefde wat net nie bevredig nie.  Sy vind nou van hierdie Goddelike eienskappe in ‘n ander vrou.  Ek wonder watter persentasie van alle seksuele misdrywe se oorsaak dalk te wyte is aan gebroke verhoudings as gevolg van ‘n gebrek aan Goddelike liefde.

Die slagveld van seksuele misbruik lê diep en wyd vol gewondes wat nie weet hoe om lief te hê of liefde te ontvang nie.

Die konteks van seksualiteit is ‘n gesonde familie. 

Die eerste seksuele oortreding volgens die Bybel is wanneer ons ‘n familielid ‘n seksobjek maak, broers met susters, ouers met kinders, bloedskande. (Lev 18:17; 20:12) Die Bybelse familie het die meeste van die tyd dieselfde vertrek gedeel, wat die fokus op seks beperk het.  Die meeste seksuele misbruik is egter vandag ook binne die raamwerk van familie, maar in isolasie.  Die gesonde familie bied ‘n atmosfeer vir seksualiteit om normaal te bly. Familie is die wese van die Godheid. Vader, Seun en Heilige Gees.  Wanneer die kerk die hart van familie verloor, verloor ons die wese van God se hart.  Vaders en moeders wat mekaar en hulle kinders liefhet met ‘n goddelike vrug van die Gees liefde, maak gesonde en selfstandige kinders groot.  Kinders wat hulle ouers en broers en susters liefhet op ‘n goddelike vrug van die Gees liefde, versterk die band nog verder, en maak die familie ‘n ondeurdringbare krag.

Dis met hierdie gedagte en begrip dat Paulus die Korinte gemeente vermaan; “’N MENS hoor waarlik van hoerery onder julle, en hoerery van so ’n aard as wat selfs onder die heidene nie bekend is nie: dat iemand die vrou van sy vader het. 2        En tog is julle opgeblase in plaas dat julle liewer getreur het, sodat hy wat hierdie daad gedoen het, kan verwyder word onder julle uit.”[3] Die gemeente is ‘n geesvervulde kragtige gemeente, en tog sien hulle seksuele misdrywe maklik oor. Hulle ‘tolerate’ dit! Hulle mis God se hart oor familie.  Die bruid is bestem om die vrou van die Seun van God te word! Seksuele sonde is ‘n regstreekse verraaiing van God se hart, van eenheid, van Sy liefde, van Sy orde.  Daarom die drastiese optrede, weereens binne die raamwerk van familie. Paulus maak dit duidelik, dat hy verwys na mense binne die huisgesin van God. (1 Cor 5:12)

Dissipline en God se Gesin

Die kern van Bybelse straf en tug is gerig om te red, nie totaal weg te stoot en te verwerp nie.  Ons kyk met ‘n ewigheidsblik en motief. “Dat hy so iemand aan Satan oor lewer tot verderf van die vlees, sodat die gees gered kan word in die dag van die Here Jesus.”[4] Ons kan nog nie die wêreld oordeel nie, ons sal eendag. (2 Cor 6:2) Nou roep Paulus die kerk om die binne in die gesin van God streng te vermaan, soos ‘n Pa ‘n rebelse kind vermaan en straf. Die rebelsheid van een kind wat oorgesien word, maak die ander kinders ook rebels. Die kind moet voel hoe dit voel om uitgelewer te word, buite te wees. Sonder beskerming, sonder al die voordele.  Sodat die kind tot inkeer sal kom, sy liggaam die konsekwensies betaal van sy of haar dade maar gered vir die ewigheid.

As die kerk en geestelike ouers nie ferm op tree nie, word die hele familie en gesin besoedel. (1 Cor 5:6) Dis sekerlik die waarheid van al die sondes, seksuele sonde is die maklikste oordraagbaar.  Dit is ook duidelik uit hierdie skrifgedeelte dat nie alle sonde dieselfde is nie.  Iemand wat verkrag word, beleef nie dieselfde seer as om voor gelieg te word, of om van geskinder te word nie. Die verwoesting van egbreek en owerspel raak gesinne, die hele uitgebreide familie, en generasies om te kom. (Mal 2:10-16)  Seksuele sonde is ‘n sonde teen jou eie liggaam. (2 Cor 6:18) Dit verraai die verbondenheid en eenheid van God se liefde.

Verbond, eenwording, in verbondenheid tekens van ‘n dieper konneksie.

Die woord verbond kom telkens voor in hierdie 2 hoofstukke.  God het verbond daar gestel om ons te wys op die eenheid wat in die Godheid bestaan.  Jy kan nie God skei nie, hulle is een! Net so min kan ‘n man en vrou skei. Sien die blog oor hoe hierdie eenheid werk. Dit is hoekom die volgende sondes teen die karakter en hart van verbond is.  “Moenie dwaal nie! Geen hoereerders of afgodedienaars of egbrekers of wellustelinge of sodomiete of diewe of gierigaards of dronkaards of kwaadsprekers of rowers sal die koninkryk van God beërwe nie.”[5] Paulus praat eksplisiet oor die eenheid tussen man en vrou en die verkeerd van egbreek. Of weet julle nie dat julle liggaam ’n tempel is van die Heilige Gees wat in julle is, wat julle van God het, en dat julle nie aan julself behoort nie? 20 Want julle is duur gekoop. Verheerlik God dan in julle liggaam en in julle gees wat aan God behoort.[6]

“en net so het ook die manne die natuurlike verkeer met die vrou laat vaar en in hulle wellus teenoor mekaar ontbrand: manne het met manne skandelikheid bedrywe en in hulleself die noodwendige vergelding van hulle dwaling ontvang.”[7] Die dwaling van homoseksualiteit probeer hulle dade regverdig, maar ‘n mens sien ongelukkig nie sy dwaling reg in die begin nie, dis eers baie later wanneer jy ouer is wat sien hoe ver jy afgedwaal het van God se plan.  Hulle redeneer dat dit nie ‘n sonde is nie, hulle is dan so gemaak, so geskape deur die Here.  Maar om ‘n rowwe humeur te hê van jongs af, maak nie jou humeur toelaatbaar nie. Dieselfde geld vir al die sondes. Ons is almal in sonde gebore en het ‘n innerlike geneigdheid na die verkeerde, maar dit regverdig nie ons verkeerde gedrag nie, ek is nou maar so gemaak, dit is hoe dit is nie … (Rom 2:23) Jesus red sondaars! Hy alleen kan ons verander in ‘n oomblik en ons nuwe mense maak. (2 Cor 5:27). Die krag van Jesus Christus tot redding is groter as die misleiding van die vyand.

Die verskil tussen wellus en Goddelike liefde

Seksuele sondes is egter volop in die kerk: Egbreek, owerspel, pornografie, voorhuwelikse seks, pedofiele en ook verkragting.  Vir gelowiges is ons gesig gerig na Hom, en stap ons elke dag verder weg van hierdie praktyke na Sy heerlike lig.  (Kol 3:1-10) Iemand wat vasgevang is in seksuele sonde eien hulleself die reg toe om bevredig te word ten koste van iemand anders. Hulle bou hulle geluk/bevrediging/plesier/genot op iemand anders se seer.  God het bedoel dat seks ‘n wonderlike ‘celebration’ is van die eenheid tussen ‘n man en ‘n vrou! Dan is die huweliksdaad gemaklik, normaal en bied beide partye wederkerige plesier en genot. Dis vloei uit die vrug van die Heilige Gees.

John Piper skryf in sy boek “Sex and the supremacy of Christ” Sexuality is designed by God as a way to know God in Christ more fully. Knowing God in Christ more fully is designed as a way of guarding and guiding our sexuality” Soos my vriend Mike Wood my geleer het: “all addiction is a sign of malnutrition” Ons seksuele begeerte soek ‘n dieper konneksie as bloot net kontak met ‘n liggaam. Ons is soekend na ‘n eenheid en ‘n volheid, ‘n vervulling wat net in ons verbondenheid met Christus vervul kan word. Jesus oorwin alle seksuele temptasies omdat Hy liefhet soos God liefhet.  Hy betaal vir ons sonde met Sy lewe, sodat ons vry kan wees.  HY genees elke keer op ‘n ander manier, want hy wil nie net die liggaam genees nie, Hy wil ons genees op elke vlak. Die vrou wat lei aan verwerping oor haar siekte met bloedvloeiing word openlik herstel, die owerspelige vrou wat op heterdaad betrap is kry Sy genade, die moeder se seun lewe, die blinde sien.

Seksuele sonde is selfsugtig, selfbehep, self-indulgent.  God se liefde gee, en gee, en gee vanuit ‘n onuitputbare fontein van wie Hy is! Soos ons groei om elke dag meer soos Hy lief te hê, herstel hy die soeke in ons eie hart, en maak ons vol, vergenoegd, en tevrede!

Die wonderlike goddelike geskenk van selibaat wees.

Selibaat wees is ‘n geskenk. Dis die eerste prys volgens Paulus. (1 Cor 7:7) Om selibaat te wees is nie ‘n vloek of straf nie, inteendeel Jesus was selibaat, Paulus verkies sy alleenwees bo ‘n huweliksmaat. Weereens vanuit die perspektief van die die vrug van die Heilige Gees, leer God ons om seks nie eerste prioriteit te maak nie. Ons kan wag. Dit is die vrug van selfbeheersing, temperance (abstaining from excess). Die jongmens wag en hou sy pad rein tot op die huweliksnag. Die man en vrou kan wag vir tye van gebed en toewyding aan God. (1 Kor 7:1-5) Daar is swangerskap, terminale siekte, maandstonde… alles tye van wag en seksuele stilte. Seksualiteit is siklies, soos die getye in die see. Ons is nie gemaak om altyd op stormsterkte te funksioneer nie. Dit is abnormaal.  Paulus bring sy liggaam en vlees onder beheer, deur dit te ‘restrain’. (1 Cor 9:27) But [like a boxer] I buffet my body [handle it roughly, discipline it by hardships] and subdue it, for fear that after proclaiming to others the Gospel and things pertaining to it, I myself should become unfit [not stand the test, be unapproved and rejected as a counterfeit]. [8]

Die bruid verteenwoordig God se hart, waardes en leefstyl op aarde. Ons dade is belangriker as woorde, want ons dade preek. Wanneer kerkleiers nie daadwerklik optree en die gesin van God soos waardige geestelike ouers opvoed nie, dan verloor die kerk Sy mandaat en krag.  Daarom Paulus se sterk optrede! Dit gaan oor God se eer!

Heiligmaking is hoe God die kerk gebruik om mense tot ‘n sondebesef te bring.

Die kerk se een groot opdrag is gaan maak dissipels. Bekering en sondebesef kom deur die prediking en leefwyse van die gemeente en die werking van die Heilige Gees. Let wel, ‘HEILIGE’ Gees. Wanneer die kerk sonde oorsien, sonder om die sondaar te help om bevryding te verkry, wanneer die kerk dan gevolglik lou word, verloor ons ons krag. Die sout is laf, die water is lou! Die kerk versamel nie net mense om ‘n program, persoon of gebou nie. Die kerk lei mense om ‘n lewe van “repentance” te leef.  Ons laat toe dat die Heilige Gees ons elke dag, by elke geleentheid aanspreek en oortuig van sonde, sodat ons kan verander en meer en meer word soos Jesus.

Gaan lees gerus weer 1 Corintians 5, 6 en 7.  Sien God se hart vir familie! Sien Sy hart en soeke na volwassenheid, mense wat sake kan oordeel en uitsluitsel gee.  Sien God se hart oor die heiligheid van Sy kerk, jy die individu, die lokale gemeente en die kerk universeel.


[1] Die Bybel: Ou Vertaling. (1996). (Eze 16:8).

[2] Die Bybel: Ou Vertaling. (1996). (Eph 5:25–27).

[3] Die Bybel: Ou Vertaling. (1996). (1 Co 5:2).

[4] Die Bybel: Ou Vertaling. (1996). (1 Co 5:5).

[5] Die Bybel: Ou Vertaling. (1996). (1 Co 6:10).

[6] Die Bybel: Ou Vertaling. (1996). (1 Co 6:19–20).

[7] Die Bybel: Ou Vertaling. (1996). (Ro 1:27).

[8] The Amplified Bible. (1987). (1 Co 9:27).